April 23, 2012

expertise, creativity, and kindness? are you kidding?

Creedo by GM

Mean people suck.

We’ve all seen this line, right? There is even a movie with this title and it’s true: mean people do suck. But how often do we put up with them just because it is easier than calling them on it, or because we need something only they can provide?

Seth Godin recently wrote a post stating the time has come for this to end. In “The End of the Diva Paradox,” Seth writes:

The traditional scarcity model implied some sort of inverse relationship between service and quality. Not for service businesses like hotels, of course, but for the other stuff. If someone was truly gifted, of course they didn’t have the time or focus to also be kind or reasonable or good at understanding your needs. A diva was great partly because, we decided, she was a jerk.

When I see it stated like that I think what a fool was I to buy that kind of thinking, but it was the norm. Could that be changing? I have had reason to spend a lot of time in the company of medical specialists this year, and the Diva Doctor and their staff are alive and well.  As Seth puts it:

Great surgeons don’t need to be respectful or have a talented, kind or alert front desk staff. They’re great at the surgery part, and you’re not here for the service, you’re here to get well (if you believe that the surgery part is what matters). In fact, gruffness might be a clue to their skill for some.

I have to admit I bought into that thinking when I was choosing an Oncologist, but after several months of conflicting information, unreturned phone calls, poor service AND attitude, I am changing my tune.

Seth believes the time has come when scarcity of expertise is no longer an issue, and consequently bad behavior need not be tolerated for it. It seems to me that in the medical profession especially, kindness should be required. After all, if you are dealing with someone who feels poorly to begin with, how is being mean or just plain arrogant an asset?

On the flip side of this, feeling poorly can make one be less than their best. I can attest to this and so can my husband. However, when it comes to my work, I make sure that I am able to put on a smile and treat the people I deal with respectfully. It is not an option, in my opinion. I think I see evidence of this way of being spreading as Seth believes.

For example, this morning Steve and I were watching an interview with Dan Auerbach and Patrick Carney of The Black Keys. The question was asked how do they remain humble in the face of fame? Auerbach said his family wouldn’t tolerate anything else. Why should they? Why should anyone? Are the days of rock stars trashing hotel rooms and requesting only green M&Ms over?

The “mission” in my photo up there was in the office of a neurosurgeon I saw recently. I was treated well in that office, and I love the mission, however I would like to see kindness be the norm without direction.

I would like to believe we can abolish mean people everywhere, but I don’t think that will happen.

In the blogosphere and artosphere, like anywhere else, we see both sides of this story. However, I think it is time we require it of the people we deal with in business and service of any kind. I do know that the next time a receptionist yells at me on the phone I will ask them please to have more respect. I suppose the challenge lies in not putting up with it while maintaining your own good behavior. In other words, not sinking to their level as a retort.

Have you found yourself putting up with sub par behavior from professionals? In what ways could you respond differently without being mean?

Filed Under: Conversation Starters, Plot Notes Tagged With: , , , , , 4 Comments
April 19, 2011

on factories: why respect is more important than craft

industrial ad pop art by frozen time photo

industrial ad pop art by frozen time photo - click image for more info



There is a fundamental problem with the idea of buying “handmade.” Chiefly that the vast majority of things we buy are made by hand.

The hands don’t look familiar, though. They maybe a different color. They may be rough, cracked. They use tools & machines we don’t understand. The hands that made your bookshelf, sofa, or television may be thinner than yours – achy from lack of food.

Those hands have never had much of a choice in how they earn a living. Nor have they had much choice in how they live, where they live, or who governs them.

Those hands get no respect.

Yes, those hands work in factories. But factories aren’t bad. This handmade movement isn’t about factories. It’s not about mass production, it’s not about luxury vs austerity. The handmade movement is about respect: for ourselves, for our goods, for others, and for our community.

The factory system as we know it now is about subjugating workers, concentrating power, and maximizing profit at the expense of quality. In this system, people – and their hands – are merely pawns in a game of profit. Respect is not a consideration.

In recent years, we have rediscovered the ties that bind us together as humans. The digital age – coupled with crippling consumerism – has helped us see each other as equals and not human steps on a ladder to higher status. We recognize the respect due to all of those around us.

Including makers of all ilks.

Is it possible that striving to create a business model that generates respect is as valid as a business model that generates profit?

When I look around the blogosphere, Etsy, eBay, and other marketplaces, I see many individuals, makers, and mom & pop businesses that don’t respect themselves, let alone those who are buying from them. I see makers underselling, I see coaches apologizing, I see designers ceding power, and I see potential visionaries wearing blinders.

I see petty conversations. I see back stabbing. I see values out of focus.

As the handmade movement has grown, it has adopted its own limiting set of expectations.

Instead of creating new rules, we have a tendency to apply old rules to a new paradigm. This is a moment in time where that won’t work. The rules are being rewritten and reimagined – we can choose to be a part of it or not.

I propose that we codify an expectation of respect throughout craft culture, microbusiness, and personal consumption. If you’re an entrepreneur, respect yourself in your prices, your product descriptions, your conversations with cooperititon [definition coming!], and your use of the marketplace. If you’re a consumer, respect others – all of them – for the value they add to your life through the products they produce – whether lovingly handcrafted or mechanically constructed.

As the contemporary handmade movement grows, matures, and scales, we will learn to create factories, collectives, franchises, and chains that embody the respect we have rediscovered in ourselves & those around us.

We can build a system that promotes respect instead of denying it.

How are you working today to promote respect in business & in life? What businesses around you – or around the world – promote respect in innovative ways?

Filed Under: mindful spending Tagged With: , , , 23 Comments