Over the last month I’ve had to remember what it means to have an abundance of time to do the things you want, instead of the things you need to do, or feel you must do. And to be honest, it has been difficult. Scratch that, it has been pretty darn hard.
I hadn’t realized how much I let my value depend on how much I was doing in my life, and how much I made myself feel bad if I spent too much time doing the things I wanted to be doing.
Mid June, I graduated from college, quit both of my jobs, and went back to my hometown to hang out for a month before heading back to Seattle for grad school. And let me tell you, the first week, I felt so very lost. I was used to having people depend on me to show up at work at 9am, and suddenly I was waking up in the morning with nowhere I had to be. It was strange and I felt useless. But I gradually realized that feeling bad wasn’t productive, or a good use of free time at all.
I think that a lot of people struggle with the same thing. We live in a society that perpetuates the idea that being busy is better, and that if you aren’t busy, then you’re doing something really wrong.
But you know what?
Life really is supposed to be about doing the things you enjoy, and if you’re always too busy for those things, then what kind of life is that?
So In the last month I’ve gone hiking, read for pleasure, kept up with my favorite blogs, and spent hours at the pool working on my tan. And you know what? It has been really really great. I think that when I’m back in school in a week, I’m going to be really thankful that I had this month to breathe, before everything starts back up again.
So I’m begging you, if it’s an hour you have free, or a day, don’t let yourself feel guilty for indulging in your favorite things. Instead, acknowledge that you’re fortunate to even have that time, and then go enjoy yourself!