i’m supposed to be a creative person. i routinely slap together loud and colorful outfits. i have a whole drawer full of clothes dedicated to painting, ones that welcome new paint splotches like badges of honor. i seek out the work of other artists to decorate my home, and i encourage my son to scribble outside the lines.
But this past weekend, after many hours of unwarranted stressing out and a furrowed brow, i gave myself a good swift “i shoulda had a V-8!” smack in the forehead. i realized i was wigging out over the fear of a dining room table. It was ridiculous.
The back-story here is not terribly interesting, but maybe a little bit necessary. Suffice it to say that i’ve had a dining room without surface for dining for about 4 months now. It’s been eating away at me slowly. The beginning of a lovely table sits in my garage. It’s a sad, lonely temporarily abandoned project started by my sweet husband. And i can’t really blame him. He works a lot. He’s been picking up my slack and caring for our son while i slowly escape the trappings of all-day morning sickness. And he’s been preoccupied with plans to add a new bedroom to our house to make way for our pending arrival.
“Ok”, i said. “Come the end of September, if we still lack the ability the dine in the dining room, i’m a-gonna buy us a darned table!”
Our plan was to find a cheap placeholder….IKEA? Target? We settled on The Dump as a starting place. And i bet you can just guess what happened next. We passed over all the inexpensive and reasonable choices and fell in love with a completely inappropriate table instead. 10 feet long (our dining room is only 12′) and made of salvage wood with an amazing criss-cross metal trestle base so beautiful, it made me think i might start eating UNDER the table.
Our original plan was to have a big square table to suit the room. Our original plan was to be able to seat 10-12 adults so i could host a holiday meal for once. Our original plan was to have something practical.
After many hours that night of “should we/shouldn’t we”, i realized i was being close-minded. i was not being my creative self.
Dang it! i was afraid of a table! Metal and wood. It was scaring me off.
So i snapped out of it, we stopped talking and we bought it. I LOVE IT!
Sure we have to put it right up against one wall to make it fit. i’m planning to prop a chalkboard at the end near the wall and draw pretty doodles and write menus for dinner parties on it!
Sure it only really seats 6-7 people. But let’s face it, i don’t really want to host a throng for a sit-down dinner anyway. i’m a buffet, or coffee-and-dessert kinda girl.
Sure it’s a little odd and industrial for a dining room table. But nobody said i had to have a shiny lacquered table in my dining room, did they?
Letting go and embracing something outside the plan, a little outside the box and a little unconventional felt great. i felt like myself. i don’t want to go through life being afraid of tables…or any of the “small stuff.” i want to connect to beautiful things and bring them into my life, whether or not they are on my to-do-list.
And i just bet i will have more fun in our slightly quirky dining room than i would in a more traditional one, because i’ll feel at-home.