Creating Congruence

Last week Tara Gentile shared a thoughtful post here on Scoutie Girl all about creating a lifestyle that is authentic to you.

It spoke to me, because I’m there. I’ve been thinking a lot lately about authenticity, harmony, congruence. About whether my values, desires, and what I want from life actually match up with my..yeah, life!

The one I’m living. Right now. Not the one I’m almost living, planning on living, or thinking about creating.

So, like Tara, I’m looking at the larger picture, the lifestyle picture. The location. The home. The jobs. The relationships. While there are so many foundational things perfectly in place, there are many things that just don’t fit.

That’s what happens when you start to take a close, close look at congruence.

What is incongruent inevitably rises to the surface. And floats there.

It’s been uncomfortable to sit with that knowledge.

If you’re like me, trying to wrap your head around how to bring congruence to the most massive aspects of your life might be overwhelming.

My head was spinning with all of it. And then I had an insight.

I can find congruence right now. It’s in each moment.

I’m not talking about making small, incremental changes toward your large goals. I’m not talking about saving up to buy the home that feels right in the right town, or methodically working toward your dream job. That’s another post for another time.

I’m talking about finding congruence, harmony, authenticity right this second, not only in what you’re doing, but in the how.

I may already be doing something that’s part of my life design, but am I going about it in a way that supports my values and desires?

It’s in the tiniest of daily choices (which apple should I buy? what book will I read?) and also in the attitudes, qualities, and awareness we bring to each interaction.

How I listen to my husband. How I speak to my children. How I brush my teeth.

How I practice yoga. How I prepare food. How I meet new people.

How I make art, or write. How I treat myself. How I clean my house.

I do these things every day. I get to choose how. I get to take a deep breath, and ask myself:

Am I doing this thing in a way that is congruent with how I want to create my life? If not, can I find a way to create alignment?

Am I bringing openness, patience, love, and expansiveness to these interactions? Or tension, hurriedness, aloofness, self-punishment?

The moment is right now, the moment is what is happening, the moment is something I can’t put off until the future. This moment is the time for me to be authentic. To find harmony. To create congruence.

Here’s to you finding congruence, right now, in this moment.

xoxo, Maeg

4 thoughts on “Creating Congruence

  1. I feel like there is this universal shift among folks where aligning our lives to our values & desires is of the utmost importance this year. I have discussed these same ideas that you voiced in your post so much lately.

    I actually made this my focus for this new year. 2012 is all about authenticity and simplicity in my life and business! For me achieving this goal means living everyday with focused intention and attention to that which is most important in my life, truly inspires me and makes me feel genuine joy and a sense that what I am doing is exactly what I am suppose to be doing.

    Specifically in my design biz, I’ve realized that I do not have to try to attempt every new marketing tactic, social media site, latest trend, follow the advice of every person who seems to have achieved success, etc. Instead, I will focus on those “mentors” whose message and business knowledge are truly aligned with MY definition of success, values and goals for my business.

    Thank you for sharing your ideas and bringing this “mindshift” into light for others to think about and discuss. :)

    Tania Welch

    I wish for you great joy, peace, prosperity and an abundance of happiness in 2012!”

  2. Thank you for this lovely post. It is well written and oh so true. Just this morning I noticed how my energy was slowing down.

    I am in the final stages of completing new pieces for photos of my gift line. The stains were discontinued just before I was ready to do a big marketing push. Up until today I was full of energy creating samples using the new stains.

    Noticing this dramatic shift I took time to examine my thoughts and feelings around what I was doing. Uncovering some outdated beliefs I was able to allow the truth to surface and love to dissolve the thoughts and feelings that are no longer congruent with who I am today.

    It makes such a difference to focus on how we are living this precious moment.



  3. “Am I bringing openness, patience, love, and expansiveness to these interactions? Or tension, hurriedness, aloofness, self-punishment?”

    This is the part that resonates most with me. Oh how I punish myself for being me while I try to use my business to encourage self-love. Even finding a way to change that one aspect is overwhelming to me. But, maybe if I take a little time to review my day so I can find the actions done with confidence and love, and the actions done out of loathing or panic,I can find a pattern. Then, I can join you all on your journey to authenticity. To congruence.

  4. Here’s to the power of positive thought! I too resonate with your “self punishment” line. Why are we so hard on ourselves/ I’m working on telling myself that I can do something over and over instead of telling myself that I can’t. My subconscious doesn’t need to know if it’s true or not. And just because it’s not happening in the now doesn’t mean it won’t.

    A lesson that needs constant reminding though, so thanks for this well written post Maeg!

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