Changing Course

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I recently put a post up on my blog telling my readers that I would be taking a 90-day hiatus from blogging.  It was a difficult post to write, but it was also exhilarating.

The blogging sabbatical was meant to give me more time to pursue a different type of writing – fiction.  The art of weaving a story has always felt a bit mysterious to me, like a glittery gift that other people received, nestled into the blanket alongside them when they were delivered to their mother’s arms.  I didn’t think one of these glittery things had accompanied me, and yet I felt this desire to try my hand at creating a fictional world.  In fact, stories and characters forced their way into my brain, asking for attention.  For the most part, I ignored them because, as exciting as fiction seemed, I was already on my way down a writing road.  I had already embarked on one dream – and that was creating a successful blog, something that I had put a lot of myself into.

That I kept feeling the pull to spend my energy elsewhere was either an annoyance or a dismal sign of my incredible fickleness, depending on my mood.  I tried to convince myself that both dreams were on the same path, that blogging was providing the discipline that I needed to be a writer.  The truth was that I spent a lot of time and energy wondering whether one was keeping me from pursuing the other.

So this was what I brought to the table when I spoke a couple weeks ago with a coach who specializes in helping woman reach their creative goals.

After listening to my ambivalence, she challenged me to take 90 days off blogging to pursue writing.  I balked.  How could I let go of the dream I was actually making some progress in?   But my coach reminded me of my own words – that I had always dreamed of being an author and that even letting myself dream it felt bold.

Pursuing something bold, she maintained, requires bold action.

I surprised myself by agreeing to it.

And I was bold.  Not only did I step away from the blog, I joined up with National Novel Writing Month and am now 14,000 words deep into a work of fiction and loving it.  I don’t know whether it’ll be any good.  I don’t know how I’ll feel about the whole venture in a month.  I don’t know whether I’ll go back to the blog.

But I do know that I’m really glad I took the gamble.

I always wanted to be a person who wanted just one thing and went after it.  But the truth is, I’m a person who wants a lot of things, and sometimes that means I have to step away from one dream and step into another.

Who knows where it will lead.

8 thoughts on “Changing Course

  1. When I saw your photo I thought of Robert Frost. Then I read you post and had an “ah ha” feeling. I feel very fickle as well. I love my creative efforts in textile and now in metal, but for years have had this nagging pull to write fiction. I began the story and then thought, “what are you doing…you are trying to do too many things at one time.” So I set it aside, but I can’t stop those characters from marching through my brain. Also, if you have not seen this writers site…take a look it has a lot of good information. I’m not affiliated with them in any way…other then I go there and read things when the “writing muse” hits… http://www.shewrites.com/

  2. Katie, this is so exciting!!! I’m really happy for you, and it sounds like you have an awesome coach.

    I’m a jewelry designer and blogger who used to do a lot of fiction writing, and who misses it terribly. Sometimes I think about taking a break to work on some short story ideas I have kicking around. I’d love to hear how your novel turns out and how you feel at the end of 90 days, and I hope you’ll keep us informed!

    — Sarah, who was also meant to do a lot of things.

  3. I love what you wrote at the bottom of this post:
    “I always wanted to be a person who wanted just one thing and went after it. But the truth is, I’m a person who wants a lot of things, and sometimes that means I have to step away from one dream and step into another.”
    I can so relate to this. Good for you for acknowledging this, and following your new dream!

  4. Oh good for you! 😀 I don’t even know you, and just found your blog, but I’m excited for you nevertheless. This is the sort of thing that makes life worth living, and the reason we have books at all. 😛

  5. “That I kept feeling the pull to spend my energy elsewhere was either an annoyance or a dismal sign of my incredible fickleness, depending on my mood.” Oh how I can relate!

    Thank you for sharing your story – and example – with us. And congratulations on moving boldly forward!

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