beauty is a little girl with no hair

Lola loves our new house. She has tons of room to play, run, and jump around. She loves that her toys are in a special little area. She loves that the kitchen is big enough that she can watch me cook – even if it makes me a nervous wreck…

But Lola did not take kindly to the process of packing up the old house. She started pulling her hair.

At first, it was nothing. Then she started pulling out bigger chunks. When it became clear she wouldn’t stop, I cut it into an adorable little pixie cut. Very cute. When her hair could no longer cover the spot on her head without looking like a balding man’s comb over, I cut it completely off – just so that she would stop. Not exactly the kind of hair cut I enjoy giving my tiny princess.

Of course, I still see her for the beautiful little girl she is. And goodness knows, she doesn’t realize her hair isn’t supposed to be a quarter inch long. She does, however, know how many people have told her how ridiculously beautiful she looks in her candy pink Phillies hat. With no hair, her eyes look bigger & brighter and you can see her fantastically expressive eyebrows.

When was the last time you cut off your hair?

So often we fixate on details that don’t matter. We can’t see the beauty of what we’ve created because an assumption gets in our way. Letting an assumption cloud our judgment while we’re creating is a surefire way to create something mediocre. It may be nice, functional, practical – but is it innovative? unique? beautiful?

Need help challenging your preconceptions & creative assumptions?

  1. Ask for a second opinion. A stranger’s eyes see past your every day, in the box notions.
  2. Keep a clear focus. When you’re concentrating on solving a problem or meeting a specific need (like getting your daughter to stop pulling her hair!), it’s easier to make difficult decisions that challenge the status quo.
  3. Consider alternatives. Especially unexpected or just plain crazy alternatives. By allowing yourself to break from “reality,” you’re more likely to reimagine reality in a way that helps you meet your goal.

23 thoughts on “beauty is a little girl with no hair

  1. My cousin pulled her hair just like that when she was small. She grew into a beautiful woman with a gorgeous head of hair. thank you for reminding me of her. beautiful little girl.

  2. I envy her eyebrow shape and her long, pretty lashes! And just imagine how much more comfortable she must be with short hair in the summer, too. In the end, it all grows back out anyway!

    This story reminds me of a classmate back in early elementary school who cut a nice, big V-shape into her bangs the night before picture day at school. It wasn’t funny to her parents then, but they certainly get some laughs out of it now!

    Then there was the time my mom walked into the kitchen and caught me – then a toddler – trying to wash my nearly bald head in the kitchen sink with cold water and a Brillo pad. Be assured, Tara, that 32 years later I still have plenty of hair. Some days I wish I could nearly shave it off, but I’ve never been able to pull off the pixie cut as well as Miss Lola can!

    1. i agree about the short hair being more comfortable. i normally sport quite a short ‘do myself – but i’ve been growing it out and i’m SO hot (not in a good way…).

      and jen, brillo pad? hilarious. it’s amazing what the toddler mind can come up with!

  3. I see what you mean about her eyes! She’s like a fawn :)

    I will be employing #3 in a few weeks when I bring my entire loom (!!!) to demo weaving at a street fair in Chelsea, MI. I thought of it for a second and decided it was totally crazy, but then someone I work with suggested it when I was telling her about the event. Just seeing it from someone else’s perspective (“that would be so awesome!”) helped me realize just how great it would be. And not THAT crazy…

  4. I actually shaved my own head { down to about a 1/4 inch} maybe 6 years ago, and it was awesome! So easy to ‘deal with’ { meaning zero maintenance!}
    She is beautiful!
    { we all are, hair or no hair….}
    ~Diana

    1. i am ALL about short hair, diana. and i’ve never really cared what anyone thinks about it. never have i shaved my hair though… maybe it’s time for a little solidarity…!

  5. I’m definitely having trouble with #2 lately! I feel like my brain is just all over the place! I need to relearn how to focus on one thing at a time.

    1. hi margie! rarely do i focus on one thing at a time – just not in my dna – but i do try to hone the focus of each thing i’m working on. i try to tear away (no pun intended) what is extraneous and concentrate on the real heart of what i’m working on!

  6. Tara, love, love , love your thoughts on inner beauty and others’ perceptions. My son has no hair for 2 years due to an autoimmune disease and it doesn’t bother him at all, even though he is a teenager! he has totally learned the concept that it is what is on the inside that counts, and if someone feels differently then its their problem! Thanks for reminding us of that in your post today…it really hit home! Lola is absolutely beautiful by the way! And enjoy the new house!

    I wrote more about it here: http://galesdesigns.com/2009/09/heroes/

    1. thank you, beth! your son is SO handsome. and kudos to him for having the wherewithal to recognize that it’s not HIS problem! cause, he certainly doesn’t have one at all.

  7. What a great solution to your babe’s problem! And now she has a thing for hats that’s it- you’ll be investing in every shape and size of hat! My girls all love hats since they were toddlers!!
    As to the second opinion, good idea, in theory…last week I showed my Hub a wonderful (to me) new appliqué pattern I’d designed and sewn of an African woman (yeah yeah, world Cup got to me…) and he said it was a nice elephant but a bit crooked! No joking!
    Pah!

  8. I’ve kept my head shaved at a few different points in my life, and very short at many others. Some of the times I shaved it were due to a bad haircut, or impatience with letting my hair grow out after having bleached it. But one time I remember I was in sort of a rut, and I felt like I needed drastic change in order to get back to myself. I needed a sort of reset button and decided to shave my head. It actually seemed to help! Being forced to be sort of naked, as it were, with no head of hair to hide behind, worked to give me the kick in the pants I needed at the time.

  9. one of my absolute dearest friends started having this problem when we were in college. it’s something she can’t control, and it’s usually triggered by stress or a change in her life. she keeps it short, just like your lola.

    she’s one of the most creative and artistic people i know, and she totally rocks the supershort hair, just like your lola. 😉

  10. Hi Tara!
    Your little one is beautiful with no hair! her face is so enchanting..but i am writing to see if she stopped pulling her hair…there is a certain disease process caused by stress in children where they do that and it may not stop once her hair is long enough to get a hold of, please, if that happens don’t let it go on, she is having internal turmoil and needs help if it doesn’t stop!I wish i could remember the name, tricho***osis…
    i happen to love long hair, as we make hair forks and hair sticks, but short hair is very cute and suits alot of people very well! i just got a hurt in my heart for your little one!
    Love to you all
    Kimi

  11. I’ve been living in the opposite ‘hair rut.’ I got stressed out in high school and chopped off all my locks. This move garnered much attention and pretty quickly cemented my role as cute, creative, pixie girl in a small town full of long blondes. It’s been over a decade since then and one day I asked the hubs on the way out the door, “which hair cut should I get today? pixie or asymmetrical bob?!” his reply…”i think i like you with long hair.” funny, he’d never seen me with long hair. I went the safe route and got the pixie. But since then I’ve been growing out my hair, not for my husband, but just to see what it would be like. It’s been a small part of a long process of pursuing creative freedom, letting go of my assumed persona, experimenting with new art forms, new music and an alternate way of thinking. My parents have offered multiple times to make an appointment and pay for the rebirth of my pixie. They miss the old routine. But I’m having too much fun growing with my hair. It’s just past my shoulders, who knows what will happen now?

    Thank you for posting about your lovely girl. Thank you for teaching her and opening up a conversation with us about true beauty.

  12. I LOVE short hair on girls and long hair on boys! Those eyes!!! She must be so cool with that cut. I loved having short hair but have had long for decades now…it’s me!
    As far as #3…that’s the way I operate.I’m always saying “What if I do it this way?” or “How would it work like this?”….always willing to try.

  13. What a sweet little girl! She looks gorgeous with her short hair. I would have been so alarmed in your situation and I think cutting her hair off was a fantastic decision. Change can be so stressful for little ones–they know something is happening that is big and maybe exciting, but scary at the same time, and confusing as they don’t really get the “why’s” of it.

    You made a fantastic, out of the box decision. I hope that I would have the clear mind to do the same thing!

  14. Visiting this post via your #reverb10 post ….

    in 2006, I shaved my head. my waist length, very thick, red hair was infested with lice. Where did it come from? none of my children had them, no one I knew had them. I treated THREE times and still they came back. I was worried that eventually my children would get them or that we had the potential of infesting hundreds of children via our work with children at the time.

    So, I decided to shave my head. At first, I was just going to cut it very, very short but being the sort of all or nothing person I am. I decided to just shave it … not slick … but as buzzed it could be, lowest setting on the hair clippers.

    That was a revolutionary moment for me. All of my identity in the trash can, my covering, the way I stood out and the way i hid. Best decision of my life and embracing it totally was the even more so. I didn’t wear hats or scarves, just let it be.

    I learned just how disturbing it is to other people. Everyone else was much more bothered that I was … bothered for me. I wasn’t bothered at all. I was FREE.

    And it grew back. and now I in the long process of neglected dreadlocks. So much fun. and I know that one day, I will probably shave it again.

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